Going back in time

December 24, 2007 at 3:12 am (belief, blog, Blogroll, christian, god, introspective, journal, judging, judgmental, life questions, questioning, rant, reflecting, struggle, support)

Like so many other people around the world, I am visiting my family for the holidays.  They live in a tiny little mountain town in north Georgia.  I actually grew up in Atlanta, but we moved farther north at the end of my 7th grade year (what an awful time for any kind of life transition!  Junior High years are hard enough as it is!)

Is it just me, or does everyone seemingly go back in time when they are around family for an extended period of time?  Suddenly, I feel like I’m 14 again.  All of our silly little neuroses that are endearing and amusing when simply experienced from afar make me want to find the nearest heavy object to bash into my head repeatedly.  The nagging and excessive worry on my behalf nearly sends me over the edge on a regular basis.  I guess I just don’t know any other way.

I’m the first to admit that I have really grown up a lot over the past several years.  It has taken a really intentional effort to take some small steps in, well, any direction really.  It’s not a pleasant experience to be stunted in any sort of way.

So, imagine my horror when all of the steps I’ve taken go out the window, with only the utterance of a single word.   It’s not necessarily the word that brings out my inner adolescent, but the tone and underlying unspokens that go along with it.

Dang, it sure takes a lot to grow up.  I’m still learning, and still messing up.  But, I guess any progress at all is a good sign, indeed.  Though still, it makes it really obvious to me just how much I need the one and only One that’s bigger than myself and my situation.  That repeated realization can only be a good thing.


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